10 Worst Conventions To Attend In Las Vegas

Who isn’t looking for an excuse to head to Vegas?  You can go for a wedding, a reunion or even a business meeting. What’s the best excuse? A convention! What convention is best for you?

There are a few things to take into consideration. What sort of conventions interest you? Also, what convention is going to be the most fun? The obvious answers are sex, electronics and beer. Of course, those are the safe bets and should offer a full week of fun. What about the bad conventions? We’re talking about the ones that suck the fun right out of Sin City. Here are the 10 Worst Conventions To Attend In Las Vegas.

10. International Paper Doll Convention
Even beyond the pain and suffering of a gazillion paper cuts and the smell of upcoming death, this convention is full of people who aren’t smart enough to operate their own printer. This makes us believe they’re not going to be able to find the hotel bar.

9. Tetra Tech RTW Activated Sludge Troubleshooting & Optimization Course
The first thing to remember is avoid the “meet and greet.” If there ever was a group of people you don’t want to shake hands with, it’s these guys.

8. Las Vegas Accordion 10th Annual Convention
No reason to bring condoms to this one. You can assume zero sex is going on. Don’t worry.  You really won’t be thinking about that. You’ll be too busy polka-ing your ears off.

7. Advanced Urology Coding Billing Reimbursement Seminar 2009
From what we can understand, these are the people who send you the bill after you pee in a cup. This is a convention designed to help them get more money for it. This might be another group you avoid shaking hands with.

6. B1 Screw Threads Convention
This is a group who meets each year to discuss the standards of threads. The thing is, the standards of threads never change. They just meet to confirm the sameness of the threads and that they are happy with that fact. Again, we are talking about screw threads.

5. American Management Association – Management for Administrative Professionals #2294
Perhaps the most vague convention we’ve ever seen. We’ve read it 20 times and still don’t know who these people are. If it gets your boss out of the office for a week, they should meet monthly.

4. Limousine & Chauffeured Transportation (LCT) Annual Show
Who is left to pick these people up at the airport?

3. Nancy Drew Sleuths Annual Convention
The list of attendees are people who find the “Harry Potter” books too complicated and have night long debates over which Hardy Boy was sexier.

2. World of Concrete Expo
They paved paradise and put up a crappy convention.

1. Tortilla Industry Association – Annual Convention & Expo
From what we can tell, tortilla technology hasn’t had any major advancements in the last 1000 years. We feel these people are wasting our time and our tax dollars. So with that, it’s a wrap. Umm, we mean with the piece… well, the tortilla. We’re hungry.

We love conventions almost as much as we love food. Check out these 20 Songs About Food That Are Really About Sex and 20 Worst Names For Junk Food.

Posted by Bill Doty, who is wearing the Nancy Drew wig.